Thursday, October 27, 2016

Getting Out of My Shell

Social anxiety is always my enemy. I feel nervous. I startle, and my voice shatters like glasses from a perfect masterpiece to the fact that I can no longer speak fluently. I can no longer express what I want to for the fear of something that I don't know (maybe the sharp stares of the people and the criticism). Just like recently in the seminar that I had, I sat the whole day saying without  words when in fact
there are so much to say. And the worst is, when I go home my conscience kills me for not doing my part or for not saying something valuable or helpful to the discussion. I always have this feeling, and the solution that I know is grab the opportunity NEXT TIME. But, what if there are no more next times? How can I pacify the voice that reiterates in me?
 I am always anxious of strangers in social gathering, and I always wanted to be alone. I feel bad when meeting people for the first time and end up giving alibis and don't want to meet them at all.
I don't take pictures when people are staring. I just wait for them to pass by or go out of the place. But what if they won't go? Will I pass the day without doing anything?
I suck at those things. I know I am bad, but slowly now I am getting out of my shell.
As a proof, here are pictures of me wearing a one-piece suit (where I know I suck as well hehe) to show my bold character now. haha
I hope you have a great day, guys!
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